Publications > Reviews
Queen Bees & Wannabes
"Wiseman (Defending Ourselves: Prevention, Self-Defense, and Recovery from Rape), offers parents a guide to navigating the adolescent landscape. Acting as a liaison between 'Girl World' and 'Planet Parent,' Wiseman helps parents understand their daughters' friendships, the power of cliques and the roles of girls within them (including Queen Bee, Sidekick, Torn Bystander, Messenger and Target). She outlines parenting styles (from 'The Lock-Her-in-a-Closet Parent' to 'The Loving-Hard-Ass Parent') and offers tips on talking to teens ('Don't use the slang your daughter uses'). The second half concentrates on boys, sex and drugs as well as what to do if your daughter needs professional help.
Within each chapter, 'Check Your Baggage' sections challenge parents to recognize their own biases and remember what it was like when they were teens; as well, Wiseman offers scripts for discussing difficult issues and advice on how to deal with them. The author also forthrightly addresses the issue of homosexuality. To wit, a 'Homophobic Questionnaire' that turns the tables on parents with questions such as 'What do you think caused your heterosexuality?' Wiseman's straightforward humor, sound advice and practical approach make this a must-read for anyone involved in the lives of teenage girls. Back matter offers extensive resource listings including fiction and nonfiction titles, movies and helpful organizations and their Web sites."
PUBLISHER'S WEEKLY
"Forget the stereotypes of sugar and spice. Girls are mean, and as this book and a recent New York Times Magazine cover story indicate, their subtle, insidious style of bullying is rapidly garnering attention and concern. Wiseman, who founded a nonprofit company dedicated to empowering teens, calls on her extensive face-to-face research with teens in this book that exposes the social minefields of female adolescence and the deep scarring that can result. Wiseman also gives an excellent overview of the common patterns of aggressive teen girl behavior with an increased focus on a parent-teacher audience, offering valuable practical advice, including how to talk about hard issues like sexual harassment. She also offers admirable, groundbreaking insight into an all-too-common issue and will be invaluable to any adult struggling to help a girl get through her teens. Also suggest Sharon Lamb's revealing title The Secret Lives of Girls."
GILLIAN ENGBERG
Booklist
"I just finished reading Queen Bees & Wannabes. First of all, I want to commend you on a great book. Every word was true, captivating, and important. I couldn't put it down! Secondly, I need to thank you. I learned so much from this book. Unfortunately it also brought back some painful memories. I believe that all adolescent girls should read it. Living in an atmosphere polluted with mean people, peer pressure, drugs, alcohol, sexual abuse, and so much more, it's crucial to know what to do when you get caught in the midst of it all. Your suggestions and strategies were so helpful! I would be lost without it!"
NORA
14 years old in Chicago, IL
"Wise, humorous, life-affirming advice for parents that is utterly respectful of girls. I recommend parents mark it up, turn the corners of pages, and heed Wiseman's creative and practical strategies for guiding girls along the sometimes treacherous pathways of growing up today. Queen Bees & Wannabes is Mapquest for parents of girls, from fifth grade all the way to young adulthood."
PATRICIA HERSCH
author of A Tribe Apart: A Journey Into the Heart of American Adolescence
"This summer we were assigned to read a book we believed would help us in some way. After searching the local Barnes and Noble I came across your book, Queen Bees & Wannabes. Like any other high school girl, not every experience over the past four years has put a smile on my face, and many have brought a lot of tears. I was aware the book was geared towards parents, but I thought I would give it a shot and at least it would fulfill the summer reading requirement. Although the book was meant as a read for parents, I found it extremely helpful. It allowed me to piece together moments in high school I thought I would never understand. I find your work very intriguing, but more importantly, inspiring. Because I have had a rough time throughout my high school years, I hope one day to be able to help teen girls through the experience. There is nothing better than knowing someone is there to listen."
LAURA
High School Senior in Bridgewater, NJ
"Who's in? Who's out? Who's cool? Who's not? Why is one girl elevated to royal status and another shunned? Queen Bees & Wannabes answers these unfathomable questions and so many more. Wiseman gives parents the insight, compassion, and skill needed to guide girls through the rocky terrain of the adolescent social world. This is such an honest and helpful book; we recommend it highly."
NINA SHANDLER
author of Ophelia's Mom
SARA SHANDLER
author of the bestselling Ophelia Speaks
"Laced with humor, insight, and practical suggestions, Queen Bees & Wannabes is the one volume that's been missing from the growing shelf of girl-centered publications. Wiseman explains the inner workings of teen culture and teaches parents, educators, and peers how to respond."
WHITNEY RANSOME and MEG MILNE MOULTON
Executive Directors, National Coalition of Girls' Schools
"Wiseman cuts through wishful parental thinking with a wonderful mixture of humor, facts, girls' voices, and a healthy dollop of reality. No, the harm cliques cause is not a natural fact of life. Wiseman gives us both hope and strategies to help our girls (and boys) build a more healthy, nurturing world for themselves."
JOE KELLY
author of Dads & Daughters: How to Inspire, Understand and Support Your Daughter When She's Growing Up So Fast, Executive Director of Dads & Daughters
"Rosalind Wiseman invites us into 'Girl World' with insight, honesty, and humor. Based on the most thorough, helpful research I know of, this book should be required reading for parents, teachers, and health professionals."
EDES P. GILBERT
Acting President, Independent Educational Services